“We met when work sent me to Australia to learn a laboratory technique for my research in Malaysia, and he was teaching me how to use the equipment…”

Noni Sharif:

“For our first date, we went to the circus.

I was in Australia for six months before returning back to my job in Malaysia. We kept in touch through letters, but after a while we realized that it was difficult to be together. I was bonded to the Malaysian government, and he couldn’t get a job in Malaysia.

Four years down the road, I received a letter from him out of nowhere. Imagine my shock! Apparently he got sick and it changed his perspective on life. We exchanged letters for a few more months before he asked me to marry him. At this point, we still didn’t know how we’re going to be physically together, but we took a leap of faith.

We did long-distance marriage after Peter’s visa to Malaysia ran out. One evening, I got a call from a good friend telling me about a PhD scholarship to any Australian universities, offered by the Commonwealth government. This is your chance to be with your husband, he said. I stayed up all night filling in the scholarship application. Out of 2000 applicants, I was one of the two that got it.”

Peter Davis:

“That was the next four years settled, at least. I had a good job with CSIRO, the top Australian research organisation and was looking for any scientific jobs in Malaysia. But science was not a thing in Malaysia at that time. During those four years Noni was in Australia, I wrote letters to research facilities and universities in Malaysia, asking if they would hire me. 

Universities required a minimum of a masters degree for any teaching position, so I enrolled myself in a part-time Masters degree. I spent four days working full-time, and one-day a week at the university for classes. 

Weekends were spent catching up on studies. It all paid off when I got a teaching position at Universiti Putra Malaysia (UPM) on a 2-year contract basis with possibility of renewal. That got around the difficult Malaysian immigration policies for foreigners.

I still needed to become a Permanent Resident (PR) of Malaysia. That way, even if my contract didn’t get renewed, I could continue living in Malaysia. Everyone I talked to about applying for Malaysian PR told me how difficult it was to get. You will be rejected for a minimum of 4 times before they even consider you, and that usually takes about 10 years. Somehow I got it at the first try in just a year and a half.

The thing is, when you’ve set your mind to something, the universe and people around you will help make it happen. We didn’t sit back and let fate take control. We kept on looking, if one thing failed, we were onto the next solution. We never gave up. Against all odds, we have been happily married and living in Malaysia for the past 30 years.”

– Humans of Kuala Lumpur

Story and photo: By their daughter Amalina Davis

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(This post was first published on February 11th 2018)

“There’s a reason why God created special children, whether its autistic, Down Syndrome or dyslexia. Its to teach us to understand the world from their eyes and look at the world differently.

“My son was two years old when the doctors diagnosed him as autistic. I had a feeling that something was not right when Dzarif was a bit slow to start walking and speaking compared to his sisters. Dzarif is now five years old and he teaches me something new every day.

There’s no dictionary or guideline on how to raise autistic kids. There’s no one size fits all. 

Autistic kids are very sensitive to sensory stimulation such as sound, touch, smell or sights that seem normal to other people. When they experience a sensory overload, they will have a meltdown. 

During Dzarif’s early stages, he refused to go to shopping malls because there are too many people. He wouldn’t even want to leave the car park and start flapping his arms like a bird because he’s overwhelmed. 

I know of a 17 years old autistic boy who repeats his sentences twice. ‘I want to buy ice cream, I want to buy ice cream. Vanilla flavour, vanilla flavour.’ 

The ice cream seller would probably think he’s an ‘orang gila’, but that’s just how the boy releases his sensory overload. 

Each autistic person has different ways of sensory release – some rock their body back and forth while speaking and some bite their fingers. It might be awkward for people who don’t understand autism, but that’s just how they are. 

It is not about changing them and molding them to be ‘normal’, it’s about accepting them for who they are. 

What’s normal anyway? You think normal is standard one, UPSR, PT3, SPM, get a job and get married. But there’s also people who never live through that track but still live as good human beings. 

“What is one thing you wished the public knew about autism?”

People have often asked me, how they can support autism. Number one, they must understand and number two they must accept. 

How? As simple as when you go to shopping malls and you see parents dealing with autistic children that are having a meltdown. Instead of staring, or worse, recording a video, you can just go to the parents, tap their shoulder and say ‘its okay, I understand.’

Dzarif sometimes has public meltdowns, the worst being in Langkawi airport. 

Overwhelmed by the number of people, he started playing with a trolley to release his energy. He has always loved moving items. 

But once we tried to return the trolley, he refused to let us. He immediately laid down in the middle of the floor of check-in queue and started rolling around. 

Everyone was staring at us and started talking amongst themselves. 

If only, someone would just tap my shoulder and say, ‘we understand.’ 

– Humans of Kuala Lumpur

Dzulkaedah runs marathons to raise awareness on autism and fundraising for NASOM – National Autism Society of Malaysia. Last year he raised RM 38,000 after running the Berlin Marathon which was given to NASOM facilities around Malaysia, like Kedah, Kelantan, Penang and Selangor to subsidize underprivileged kids for their speech therapy programme. 

He is now fundraising for the Autism Cafe project, a cafe that employs autistic youth. To contribute to this cause, please consider donating at https://www.simplygiving.com/dzul-run-ultra-for-acp

Story by Amalina Davis
Photo provided by Dzulkaedah
Photo/story edited by Mushamir Mustafa

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(This post was first published on April 1st 2018)

“I’ve been a tailor since I was 16 years old. My dad was a tailor too, and he kinda forced me to take up tailoring…”

“I didn’t like it, but eventually it was the only thing I was great at. And people think tailoring is easy, but its not like mechanical engineering where skills only mattered – there’s an art to it, the way your stitches are woven into the fabric.”

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“Saya jadi tukang jahit sejak 16 tahun lagi. Ayah saya pun tukang jahit juga, dan dia suruh saya jadi tukang jahit. Mula-mula saya tak suka, tapi lama-lama itu je yang saya pandai buat. Orang selalu ingat menjahit ni senang, tapi ia bukan macam kejuruteraan mekanikal dimana hanya kemahiran yang diperlukan – tapi ada kesenian disebaliknya, seperti cara jahitan ditenun menjadi kain dan kemasannya.”

Seen at PPR Lembah Pantai

– Humans of Kuala Lumpur

Photostory by Mushamir Mustafa

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(This post was first published on May 5th 2018)

(1/2) “I was in KL during the 13 May 1969 riots. I was 19 at that time. There were a lot of Chinese around this area then, and they were all my friends…”

(1/2) “We used to play football together from our childhood days. People from Kerinchi, Bangsar, Abdullah Hukum wanted to come, beat up the Chinese in Lembah Pantai and even murder them.

I stopped them and said, ‘Don’t you dare, this is my area. If you want to come here and cause trouble, you need permission from me. Why do you want to kill them? I know all of them since we were kids. Even though we were from different schools – me in a Malay school, and them, a Chinese school, we are all friends. Leave, now!’

I told the Chinese boys, ‘Don’t be afraid. Stay put, and they won’t bother you again. Wait until the police or army come and pick you up.’ They waited, and the police eventually came and took them to safety. 

I didn’t touch a single Chinese person, I looked after them to make sure they were safe. If they got murdered, I would have to answer to the police since I was a youth from Pantai. When the Bukit Aman police came, they took 20 youth with them. My name was first on the list because I was the ‘taiko’ of Pantai area. Luckily there was the ‘ketua kampung’ to protect us. 

People back then liked to listen to other people’s opinions and stories. People were divided and used to conspire against each other. That’s what lead to all the fighting and riots. Even amongst the Malays they used to fight each other. I don’t understand, why would you fight amongst yourselves?”

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(1/2) “Masa rusuhan 13 Mei 1969, saya ada di KL. Saya 19 tahun masa tu. Ramai orang Cina tinggal di kawasan ini, dan mereka semua kawan saya. Kami selalu main bola sama-sama masa kecil dulu. Orang-orang dari Kerinchi, Bangsar, Abdullah Hukum nak datang dan pukul orang Cina di Lembah Pantai dan ada yang nak membunuh pun.

Saya halang mereka dan bagitahu, ‘Jangan korang berani, ini kawasan aku! Kalau korang nak datang sini bawak masalah, minta izin aku dulu. Korang dah kenapa nak bunuh dorang? Aku kenal dorang dari kitorang budak kecil lagi. Memang kitorang sekolah lain-lain – aku sekolah melayu, dorang sekolah Cina, tapi kitorang semua kawan. Berambus sekarang!’

Saya bagitahu budak-budak Cina tu, ‘Jangan takut. Tenang je, dorang tak akan kacau lagi. Kita tunggu je polis ke askar datang untuk tolong.’ Mereka tunggu, dan akhirnya polis datang dan bawa mereka ke tempat yang selamat.

Saya langsung tak sentuh mana-mana orang Cina, saya jaga mereka untuk pastikan mereka selamat. Kalau ada yang terbunuh, saya yang akan bersoal jawab dengan polis sebab saya budak Pantai. Masa polis Bukit Aman datang dan tangkap 20 orang budak, nama saya nombor satu dalam senarai sebab saya taiko kawasan Pantai. Kami agak bertuah sebab ada ketua kampung yang membantu kami.

Orang dulu-dulu suka dengar cerita dan pendapat orang lain. Mereka dipuak-puakkan dan dipergunakan dengan komplot menentang antara satu sama lain. Itu yang jadi punca gaduh dan rusuhan. Antara orang melayu pun nak gaduh. Saya tak faham. Kenapa nak bergaduh sesama kita?”

– Humans of Kuala Lumpur

Seen at PPR Lembah Pantai

Photostory by Amalina Davis and Mushamir Mustafa
Translated by Khairul Ridhwan

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(This post was first published on May 5th 2018)

“When I take Fluffy to the movies I’d buy two seat tickets, just in case there’s someone who bought a ticket sitting next to me…”

“We’d usually sneak Fluffy into the cinema in a bag, but now that he’s older we don’t watch movies as often.

I’ve trained him to not be afraid of people and be comfortable in noisy situations by taking him literally everywhere I went – to the pasar malam, to my office, attend events, shopping malls, grocery stores and even meetings with my friends. 

And it’s from there that he’s not afraid of people. He’s very sociable. And even when there’s a sudden noise he is calm and will not freak out like a normal cat.

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Bila saya bawa Fluffy menonton wayang, saya akan beli 2 tiket, risau kalau ada orang lain beli tiket dan duduk sebelah saya. Selalunya kami akan sorokkan Fluffy dalam beg untuk masuk panggung, tapi sekarang dia makin tua jadi kami tak menonton wayang sekerap dulu.

Saya latih dia supaya tidak takut dengan orang lain dan biasakan dengan bunyi bising dengan bawa dia bersama saya ke mana sahaja saya pergi – ke pasar malam, ke pejabat, ke majlis-majlis, pusat beli-belah, pasar raya malah bila berjumpa kawan-kawan saya.

Dari situlah dia jadi tak takut jumpa orang lain. Dia jadi sangat sosial. Dan bila ada bunyi bising yang yang mengejut dia tetap tenang dan tidak melatah macam kucing biasa.

– H̶u̶m̶a̶n̶s̶ Cats of Kuala Lumpur

Photostory by Mushamir Mustafa
Edited by Amalina Davis, Translated by Khairul Ridhwan

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(This post was first published on May 7th 2018)

“I wore my first heels when I was 21 years old and not long after that, I put on my first dress and makeup – as a drag…”

“Many people keep asking me: ‘Are you going to change your gender?’ or ‘When are you going to go for surgery?’

The truth is I never want to change my gender identity at all. Most people especially in Malaysia are confused between a drag and a transgender. 

For me, I love to put on my favorite makeup, dress, shoes, and other accessories then perform or just show up to any occasion like my friend’s wedding to enlighten the crowd. 

When I first started few years ago, one of my family members in China was visiting us and he claimed that I was possessed by a female demon. 

Not knowing better, my parents, especially my father was very worried and insisted that the family member exorcise me on a traditional Chinese superstitious ritual. 

I felt ashamed and depressed after this incident because my family would rather accept the fact that I was possessed instead of accepting who I really am.

I threw away all my belongings when I was doing drag back then and it took me a year to recover from that, thanks to my friends. After a wake-up call, I decided not to just throw away everything I have worked so for and continue to be happy with who I want to be. Besides, those things ain’t cheap! 

Not only I am working my way to attend shows and perform, I am also getting request from some companies to host their corporate events and I believe there is a huge potential for the drag scene in Malaysia despite controversial religious issues.

Most of my friends are very supportive of what I do and even offered their help and places for me to change and do my thing. 

I find that drag is a performance that mocks masculinity, and ultimately brings light into everyone, to reveal the truth within themselves”.

– Humans of Kuala Lumpur

Photostory by Ooi Chia Shen
Edited by Mushamir Mustafa

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(This post was first published on August 20th 2018)