“New beginnings, new life. I got divorced about a year ago. Now I’m living my life as a minimalist.

It was a real journey for me. I tried to fix things with my ex-husband, but it didn’t work out, so I left him. However, I am more mature, confident and more stable in my life now. In fact, I’m living a better life than I was in my 20s.

I used to be quite shy, but I think my attitude has changed. I thought that life is too short, and you only live once. YOLO kind of thing. I developed this attitude after my divorce.

I guess as someone who went through a divorce, I hope married couples should consider divorce as a last resort. Make sure you have a solid reason before ending it, otherwise don’t simply talk about it. Don’t be like, “Ugh, I’m so angry. I want to divorce him”. I didn’t take it lightly even when my friends encouraged me (to divorce). I hope people would consider counselling or therapy.

Plus, I think couples should have a clear balance in their boundaries. It could be about anything, emotionally and whatnot. Make sure both parties know each other’s boundaries. It’s so important to have that, otherwise, you’ll have to start over with them. And of course, I believe love is not a feeling, but it is a choice. Yes, there are days when you may not like your spouse or partner, but if you choose to love them, you’ll stick with them.

So, I started my minimalist journey while I was still married. I decluttered around the house and my ex-husband enjoyed it back then. But minimalism has really helped me in terms of moving out of his space. I find it easier now that I have fewer things to bring if I must move out.

I founded a minimalist group in 2018, alongside with two other minimalist ladies. There weren’t any active minimalist group and we wanted to have an active space where we can share advice and tips with each other. Basically, help one another grow in our journey as a minimalist.

But people think that minimalism is scary. They cannot bear to let go of things they own. But truthfully, the things you own will end up owning you. You have so many things in your life, but you don’t have the time to enjoy it. Why? It’s just taking up your space physically, mentally and emotionally.

Yes, it’s hard in the beginning if you want to declutter. I’m happy to say I managed to help my friends and family to declutter as well after they’ve seen me gone through some positive changes in my life. Minimalism really does bring freedom in life for you.

And as a minimalist, after the divorce, I can say that I’ve lost 80kg (referring to the ex-husband) out of my life!

– Humans of Kuala Lumpur

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