The accident happened at Machap, Melaka. The tire exploded and the bus crashed into the telephone pole and divider. The air system also failed, and a bus relies on the air system for its brakes and to open the doors – without it I couldn’t do anything.
As we crashed the cars at the back also hit us. The front mirror and side view mirror cut my face, my lips, and my tongue. My backbone was also injured.
And two passengers died that night as well.
That was when I realized I cannot work anymore.
The thing is it’s hard to have a family when you cannot work and have no income. My wife works at a prison at Seremban and her pay is not enough for the family, what more I am just a bus driver who now is out of work.
So I was forced to leave home, and I made that decision. Within the first 6 months, I couldn’t do much jobs with my condition so I took up security guard jobs. Last time as a bus driver I would get RM1800 but as a guard, it’s terrible, it’s only RM700-800 a month.
The rent for a room is already easily RM400 – the money simply isn’t enough.
Not long after my wife asked her sister to meet up with me and get the divorce papers signed. She shouldn’t have gotten involved, but that’s how my wife wanted to communicate, she was asking for a divorce. So it happened and the process was automatic.
The worst part about the jobs now is that you work 3, 4 months but in the end they don’t pay the salary. And we can’t protect ourselves – its up to them if they want or don’t want to pay.
It’s not that I don’t want to work, there is just no chance to work. I would do any odd jobs for people – paint for them, wash clothes or clean a stall – and I’m OK, especially if accommodation is provided.
I’m now 58 years old, I’m not young anymore. Old people can’t do as much as young people.When I was younger at 30 I wasn’t like this. I was busy looking for money, I bought a house, a car…. but now I gave it all to my children, and I decided I should just not be a burden and leave (home).
I know that I’m old but I don’t want to be depending or asking people or my family and sons for help, I have to stand on my own.
And my sons, being a man – you know lah, they are closer to their mothers than their dads.
During Ramadan I still fast, and I break my fast at the mosque and I’m thankful there’s food but it’s so little, and it’s the only thing I eat for the day. Sahur was harder as there’s not much food going around.
Now my only concern is not to die in the street,and to be able to sustain myself. Saya pun tak tau berapa lama lagi nak hidup (and I don’t know how much longer I have to live). I’m already old, it’s hard to find jobs and be paid after doing it and I don’t want to be a burden to my family. I will be happy if I could have a job where there’s an accommodation, and a place to stay even if it pays RM 1000. But for now, for now I am on the streets”.
(He didn’t want his face to be shown, doesn’t want his children to know that he’s homeless.. So I took a photo of the lower part of his face….you can see the part where his lips got cut. Gave him some of my pocket money, and he said that it would cover his food for the next few days.)
Photostory by Mushamir Mustafa
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(This post was first published on July 29th 2016)
